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FRONTBURNR | September 23, 2014

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Eight Games I’m Supposed To Love But I Hate

| On 06, Mar 2013

There are certain video games you are not allowed to not like…or at least you’re not allowed to admit you don’t like.

Good example? Legend of Zelda.

You’re also not supposed to admit you’ve never played Legend of Zelda–I haven’t–since it diminishes your street cred. It’s not that I hate the game or anything. Did I mention I’ve never played it? It just never appealed to me. And I’ve always been a Sony girl, so I never had the correct hardware.

Jennifer Lawrence shrug gif Hunger Games

Just like there are games you’re NEVER supposed to admit you’ve never played, there’s a whole list of “perfect” games…”classic” games…games EVERYONE agrees are the pinnacle of gaming amazingness and don’t you dare NOT like them. I don’t like these one bit. Take that, gaming rule maker people!

put that in your pipe and smoke it downtown abbey

Assassin’s Creed and Assassin’s Creed: Revelations

Assassin's CreedRepetitive.

I was quite tempted to write repetitive over and over cause that would be funny since I would be repetitive with repetitive–recursive or something.

But doesn’t repetitive sum up Assassin’s Creed REALLY well? The first one was novel and such a damn pretty game. The story wasn’t half bad and the fight mechanics were fresh. But, BUT, after the firth-gazillionth time of searching for clues and then stalking your mark and then killing the dude and then trying to get the hell out there…repetitive. I finished the game but the thrill was gone.

Assassin’s Creed: Revelations? It was like slogging through sh*t mixed with drying cement.

Final Fantasy 1 and 2

Final Fantasy OriginsI want to explain away the rabid fanboyness over this series with the human urge to conform but I know there are folks out there who genuinely love all things Final Fantasy and not just because they’ve been told they should hump the franchise.

I’m not one of those people.

I can’t put my finger on why I hated these two games; I almost struck them from the list because I couldn’t come up with a list of reasons. All I have, is the games bored me. I was bored. I wanted to love them so I could dive into the franchise like I knew I was supposed to but they weren’t any fun and the main point of video games is to have fun, right?

God of War 2

God of War 2God of War 2 suffered from mimicking the first God of War.

I know it’s the TWO of the series so it should have a lot in common with the first: people should expect similarity within a franchise. But God of War 2 felt like another God of War with a little bit better of a story. And it was short.

And QTEs.

I hate quick-time-events. Man, I hate those things.

Killzone 2

Killzone 2Remember how Killzone was going to be the “Halo killer?”

And then when that didn’t happen–though I really enjoyed the first Killzone–everyone was SURE Killzone 2 was going to whoop up on the Halo series and make it cry.

Do you hear that?

That’s all the Halo games, pointing, laughing. The thing about Killzone 2 that made me hate it, is it failed to live up to its potential. The characters felt slugish like they had major hangovers from partying too late. And I didn’t like the focus on multi-player since the squad system sucked.

Hard.

Any of the LEGO series

LEGO Indiana JonesI have two kids who both love all of the LEGO games.

Occasionally, I’m coerced into beating something for them. Every single time I curse under my breath because I can’t stand the way these games handle.

The cameras do weird things at the most inopportune times. The controls suck. Even though I’m willing to admit a couple of them are novel,

I just don’t like them.

Myst

Myst coverThis is the only game on this list I wonder if I should revisit.

I was 11 when I played this and hated it with a passion. A passion, I say! I had notes all over my room so I wouldn’t forget things. Half the time I couldn’t figure out the puzzles.

Maybe this is more self-hatred than game hatred?

Whatever it is, I still have such an aversion to the game I can’t imagine playing it again.

Shadow of the Colossus

Shadow of the ColossusI am the only person on the face of the ENTIRE Earth who has genuine dislike for Shadow of the Colossus.

Yahtzee loves it–and he doesn’t love much of anything–and Josh loves it–he and I routinely get into tiffs over this game. He wants to hump it; I want to bash it against a jagged rock.

I know why I should love this game. Hell, it embodies everything I love about video games; creativity, story, great music and great art direction. But somewhere along the way, the game lost me.

I wanted so much to be enveloped in the story and have fun. Yes, you can have fun with a game which has a story to tell you and it doesn’t have to be “happy” story to bring in the fun element. With Shadow of the Colossus, I didn’t have fun. I didn’t enjoy the game. I wanted to throw my controller at the wall more than a couple of handfuls of times.

Nope.

Didn’t like it.

Uncharted

Uncharted Drake's FortuneThe Uncharted series is a movie wrapped in a game’s clothing.

The game looked great–much like a movie should–and even at the beginning, I couldn’t get past the idea I was just playing along to get to the cutscenes so I could see the movie play out without having to jump at something I thought was a ledge which ended up actually being a really nicely painted bit of wall.

Once I finished the game, I watched all of the cutscenes on YouTube and decided I should have just saved the money and watched YouTube since I felt the exact amount of fulfillment from watching those videos as I did from playing the whole damn game.

And then there was the ending. I’m not the only one who thought Indigo Prophecy, right? Right?! At least with Indigo Prophecy I was invested enough in the game I was almost able to ignore the Mayan-robot-alien bit or whatever.

Have I been too hard on these eight? Probably.

But each of these games all left a not so awesome taste in my mouth that has stuck with me for a very long time. And I’m not the ONLY person who doesn’t like them. I can’t be. I bet you’re just too scared to admit you’re not a fan either.

 

Comments

  1. You’re killing me smalls. Let’s forget once second about Uncharted, Assassin’s Creed and God of War 2: Three of my favorite franchises. Shadow of the Colossus though? You heathen. Top 5 game all time in my books. Begun, the Amy-Josh war has.

  2. WHAT! Uncharted!?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

  3. I agree on a few things: Assassin’s creed at least for the first one) is mind-numbingly boring, haven’t finished playing revelations, so can’t say for sure. Lego games? I give you those as well. I really don’t see what the fuss is all about. I really tried to love Lego star wars, as I love both Legos and Star Wars, and yet, still nothing. I found Myst so frustratingly obtuse, that I gave up after the 2nd puzzle, I believe. Haven’t played Killzone and SotC (I know, I know shame on me blah blah blah).
    However, I LOVED Uncharted, and GoW. as you said, it is like a movie, but at least you somewhat participate (sure, the story is so completely linear, and yet, I still loved them)

  4. I agree with you on all of these. Apparently we are kindred spirits.

  5. I can agree with you on the Lego games, and I personally never really got into Myst.. but you can’t discount entire franchises by picking one game. Assassin’s Creed 2 is a huge improvement over AC1, as is Uncharted 2.

    • Oh, but I can. If the initial game left a horrible taste in my mouth, why would I want to try another? I only played Revelations because I got it in for review.

  6. Shayde

    Can’t say I disagree on the list, except for Myst. I think, as you said, the fact you were 11 took the shine off it for you. It was the first game to really immerse you in the environment and let you figure things out for yourself. Really innovative at the time.

    • Shayde

      Oh and the Lego games shouldn’t really be grouped together. The Star Wars ones were really good, but the others, your mileage may vary.

  7. Kamille

    Uncharted is my most favorite franchise of this gen.

  8. It’s funny how our gaming backgrounds shape our preferences. Take Final Fantasy for example, I was born into the series, molded by it. By the time I played next gen rpgs like the lame Fallout and Elder Scrolls, I was already a man. The open world was just a sandbox by then.

    Seriously though, I disliked AC2: Revelations quite vehemently, it did nothing to advance the series. I will say though, your distaste for the Uncharted series (and I assume the new Tomb Raider by association) is disappointing. The action adventure genre was barely treading water but the exploration in the series as a whole rekindled the love I had. While a majority of the story is told through cutscenes, many games are guilty of the same. Does that mean you hate the Mass Effect series too? How about the sandboxy feeling of Skyrim or Fallout 3?

    With that being said, Myst sucked and is for old people.

  9. MYST?! Say it a’int so! This just proves I’m older than you. :)

  10. You forgot SimCity 3000, SimCity 4, The Sims, FF7, DeadSpace 2/3, Uncharted 2/3 (first one was by far the best and still very advanced gfx to this day imo), Infamous 2. Sorry looks like I am way past 8, but why was 8 picked as a number anyways?

    • :D I picked eight because that’s how many I had on the list by the time I was done coming up with lame reasons why I didn’t like them. Red Dead Revolver was also–initially–on the list but all I could remember about it was the damn bull that kept killing me as it ran through the barn. And even that is a faint memory.

  11. Melanie

    I’m not a gamer, as you know Amy, but the rest of my family is. I’ll have to ask them if they are fans of these or not. At any rate, the reason for my comment is that we had a LEGO game or two when my kids were younger. I thought it was hilariously inappropriate that the stubbled hero smoked.

  12. I’m pretty meh on most best-selling FPS games, but that’s probably more of a genre preference than anything. Also, I despise stealth, and it’s hard to find a well-crafted game these days that doesn’t want you to sneak past everything.

  13. I was tricked into buying a couple Assassin’s Creed games because they are so pretty and the mechanics do seem to be so smooth… but they are repetitive. :(

  14. Hillary Chybinski

    My kids laugh at me because on the Lego games – I get stuck on the walls and run in circles. . .they are both mad fans and have Batman, Star Wars and a few others I believe. . .me – complete doofus.

  15. elizabethnorton

    Please dont ever meet my boys…..they will think you are cooler than me.

  16. the only one of those I’ve ever attempted are the LEGO games–I can’t stand them. I can’t believe how much my kids love them, too. Also, Skylanders. The kids love it… me? not a fan at all.

  17. Oh man I loved MYST…totally forgot about that one.

  18. Shana Dieli

    My husband has both Assassins Creed and Uncharted and I agree that AC is very repetitive and I found Uncharted very blah. You know what video game is awesome? Dantes Inferno, seriously I really enjoy that game.

  19. Jon Camp

    I’ve never played any of those 8 either. I think I started Final Fantasy at 7 and ended with 8. The rest never really appealed to me, so I never gave them a go.